Monday, November 18, 2013

A cup of coffee and a thought, Dealing with PPD.

I am still struggling with Post partum depression, 8 months later you would think it would be better. Well, I have mostly good days. But here lately it has been going back to how I was back in June when I finally admitted I needed help. Then my Neurologist took my off my meds for it. That was back in August. But, I am still having problems with it. 
This morning it hit me in the face, I cried so hard. Yesterday, I cried and today I cried more. I am thinking a combination of  dryer being dead, Christmas coming up, Thanksgiving stress, and my son's impetigo is trying to come back because his excema is bad. No one will let me call the Doctor for a rx. It is past home remedies. All of this going on and I broke down. 
As I sat there on my bed after looking at Facebook, something I promised I wouldn't look at. I saw my family at Seaworld and we weren't there. We couldn't, so I missed my nieces bday. Another nail in the coffin.I sat there on my bed sobbing and rocking my baby. Then I noticed, somehow the booger turned in my arms and was facing me. He nuzzeled his head on my shoulder and he squeezed me. I also got pats on my back and rubbies. Just like I do to him when he cries. My sweet little man was comforting his mama. He even started to baby sing. This just made my heart melt and I stopped crying. I held him close and he looked at me.
My boy put his hand on my face as to let me know it was OK, and then there was that smile. That smile can cure any signs of the blues.Babies are truly little miracles and nothing but pure love. 
My world

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