This is so not easy. Bottle weening and bedtime issues.

I am trying to wean the boy off the bottle. I am slowly removing it as I tried to take it 100% away and my boy wouldn't drink for the rest of the day. He refused. He was so crabby. He likes his one cup but not enough to drink it all the time. The doctor told me to just take it away. I am trying but it is so hard. I am trying to not rely on it. And he is learning how to use this straw cup. 

It is great, but he isn't getting how to use it much. I am sure he will learn. I also have one that resembles a bottle.

 But, he fights it. A lot. I am trying. This is so hard. 

Now, bedtime. My boy won't go to bed. And crying it out doesn't help. He just goes for hours! 

I read to him and put nighttime lotion on him. He still won't do it. Last night was bad, and after an hour I figured out the problem. His mouth. He teethes worse at night! And he is in pain. Once I do teething gel and if it is bad enough Tylenol; he falls asleep. He then sleeps all night. I also just picked up teething tablets.  We will see how it works. But, who knew this was the reason he doesn't want to sleep. Actually, another mom would up have known. I am slow to the party. 

Me time? Take time for me?

While my hubby this morning was getting ready for work he mentioned something that has gotten my hamster wheel turning. "Take time for you." Followed by "you are the best mommy" take time for me? When is the last time I really took time for me? I mean really took me time. Sure 3 weeks ago I got my nails done, but  I was sitting there waiting for my phone to go off about the baby. Constant mom worry.  I enjoyed it but, was that the "me" time necessary for me to recharge? Probably not. I love being with my son, more than everything. But even god rested and me? Well let's just say there isn't any. Which is probably why and how I got sick. I blame the vacuum for this one. I cleaned it out Friday. And all this dust hit me. Then Sat, I used it to vacuum the floor and I didn't shut the container all the way. Anyways, he told me I need me time. I need to rest. Which is hard. I can not sit still, there is so much to do. Things to clean and a baby to pester. There is no me time. When I exercise I do it even when little man is up. I guess I need to figure something out. Perhaps a shopping trip alone at the mall is needed. Get my nails done and relax at the mall alone. Or call a friend and have her run with me. Sometimes, I hate being alone. Give daddy and boy a day to bond. What do you think? 

12 tell tale signs of momminess.

12. You argue with Dora, Mickey Mouse, or Jake. You have been there sitting around when kid is playing and that is on tv, they ask a question. You respond. You realize you are responding to a toddler's tv show. ..........hmmm. 

11. You "soccer mom" whom ever is in the passenger seat. Anyone who has had children has done this at one point or another. It is as if by instinct you do not think the seatbelt is enough, so your arm will do just fine. My sister soccer mommed my hubby on the way to Universal Studios in Orlando when she was forced to slam the breaks. His response " did.....did you just soccer mom me?" 

Sister: "no" 

"You did!"

"Omg, I did! Well it is because my purse is always there and I have to save my purse..."

Me: "yeeeaaaaahhh right, you soccer mommed him. Awwww. Hahahahaha" 

The car erupted with laughter at her momism. 

To soccer mom: place arm over passenger as if mom arm is another seat belt, as you prepare for some imminent danger. 

10. There is a dinosaur and diaper in your handbag. Yes, that was me and has been me since my little man's birth. You know you have hit mom status when you go for gum and pull out a Pamper.

9. Someone says mama and you turn.  Yup, isn't it awesome when you go somewhere and you hear "mama" from a tiny person somewhere and you turn like "what?" Even if your baby is right in front of you.

8. You haven't showered in 2 days. Yup when you have little ones or even bigger ones you sometimes forget someone very important. you. When was the last time you could shower with out someone knocking,barging in, or crying in the baby monitor for you. Even at bedtime. 

7. It takes you 10 years to pick out baby food. What? Yes, if you have a picky eater you can take a long time picking out baby food. I mean what is more compelling than the debate with your 8 month old of peaches vs pears. 

6. Your drinking cold coffee. You wake up make a baba and a cup o' joe, then never drink it because you get side tracked with other stuff.

5. You wake up to the smallest sounds in the baby monitor.  Baby sighs and omg super mom is flying and flailing into that nursery! 

4. You step on a Barbie shoe,Lego, or squeaky baby toy.  Do I really need to elaborate this one? Think pain. 

3. You have baby food on your clothes. Not by choice. This is the beginning of feeding the floor. Or perhaps you have a toddler who though it was funny. Yes dear, spaghetti belongs in mommy's pocket.

2. You haven't slept in ages. Have these bags always been there? Sleep was something you took for granted before baby. And now you miss it. 

1. All your kid has to do is smile at you with love and you melt. All it takes is that "I love you mama" smile and you are done for. It melts you at any age, and you love every minute of it. 

More or less, thoughts on 2014.

It's Nablopomo December on BlogHer and this theme is more and less. Or more or less. Whatever. It made me think of my expectations for next year. So here is a list of what I am thinking.
1. More sleep. Yeah, I am hoping for more sleep in 2014.
2. Less worrying. That won't happen but for certain things I am hoping it will.
3. More financial freedom. Who doesn't want more of this? I need this badly. Which is why I work so diligently on my eBay store and why my hubby works as hard as he does. By the way great stuff is for sale right now!
4. Less debts. Dear Santa, please deliver some ways for debts to be solved. By means on number 3 on this list.  In 2014 I want my debts to be poof (GONE).
5.MORE CLOTHES. Nothing I own fits. If it fits it's not right. My body has changed and although I am down to 113 lbs again. I need hot mama clothes that fit well. 
6. New bras. See reason 5.
7.less run ins with Nature. I mean ants and other critters getting into or trying to get into my home. This means you bears! 
8. More exercise. I do exercise but need more.
9. More "me" time. I think as mommies we cheat ourselves of pure uninterrupted "me" time. We feel guilty or never get it. Because we don't take the time.
10. More makeup and real clothes days. Ok, living in yoga pants and tanks is not really my thing. But, right now my actual clothes aren't fitting the best. To be honest neither do my Yoga pants. They are too big. I don't wear cosmetics as much as I want to. Yes, I love makeup. I like wearing it.
11. More showers. This falls into number9 as well.  I sometimes can not fit it in... until baby is asleep. Then I am too tired to. Mommies you know what I am going through.

This is my list..so far.

9 months today!!! And what a day!

Today my son is 9 months! And besides going for his 9 month physical, he had to endure a shot as well as lack of sleep last night. The doctor went over all the things that a happy healthy 9 month old should do. He is definitely one happy healthy baby, except for his diaper rash from hell and eczema. For, which he got new meds for and buttpaste. Funny name but we shall try it. It is a kind of a clay like color and has no real smell. He has a bad diaper rash and eczema makes it worse. Babies with eczema like has can not be in a peed diaper for longer than a minute to 5 minutes. Poor little guy and he has to sleep with no diaper. Ohhh boy. And he learned how to climb today... lots of firsts today. I also learned not to forget his blankie and Simba doll, especially when shots are do. He did well with his shots and I have become a pro at witnessing them. #babylife
The day turned into a hellish day soon after, not on little man's part but on my insurance. First they got the old insurance as his main insurance. Then the date of birth was wrong. Then they listed him as a girl.
I had to waste so much time today over really weird issues with the insurance office. His meds without insurance were $200! I don't have $200 at all in my account. But after a whole day of messing with them Target and I fixed the problem.
But, there is another issue ,the TV.  I am going to start limiting TV more. He doesn't need it all the time. And I am just as bad as he is. We shall see how that goes.

Finally done decorating.

I finished decorating today. Everything is as it should be. All the lights are up and then some. I love it and through all my hustle and bustle I am forgetting all the troubles of this year. Well sort of.
Today I got some sound advice from my mom. "Take half an hour for yourself.  No eBay. No hubby. No worries about little man. Go do for you. Paint or scrapbook." Good advice. I have no time for that. I work on my blogs as best I can and eBay when I am not chasing the baby around.  Then I clean. I have no time until after little man is asleep.  And if I go be by myself and I, my hubby starts asking where I am. He starts saying I am anti social and he misses me. Which I love that he misses me but, darnit I need 45 mins all to myself.  I do it for him. Why can't I get that? I deserve it right? Ladies what would you do? How do you do it?

True Happiness.

I am happy for a lot of things in my life. I am happy about having an amazing hubby and a adorable house that I can call MINE. I am happy for this coffee I am drinking, although I miss my Keurig. But, most of all I am happy for the happiest little boy in the world, my son. He just loves everything and all things make him smile. He, right now is playing with a sock and is excited about it. He just looks at me or my hubby and breaks out in the biggest cheesiest grin. Something we call "cheese face". He is the joy of my life, and I am truly thankful and blessed to have him. I want to just hug him all the time, and when he gives me that pure look of  "I love you mama." I melt. I truly melt into a thousand pieces, hubby giggles about that.

He is just an amazing little boy and he just keeps getting more and more amazing every day.

He is also a speed crawler, and already tries to walk. Lord help me. My boy is also a cheeky little man and knows when he is being naughty. He just looks at you and gives you a mischievous grin. I giggle at that, knowing darn well that I am encouraging it. But, when you are that cute, you get away with a lot. Little stinker. 

This Thanksgiving while we all give thanks to everything in our lives. I am thankful for this, my little man. I truly am and every day is precious with him. 

What makes you happiest? What are you truly thankful for?

Christmas is just around the corner, and I am freaking out! 

This is still a great deal to not pass up, I am getting a canvas of my little man. 

$25.99 free shipping gallery wrapped Canvas,Printerpix.

And speaking of great deals, I got 10 jars of  Beach Nut jar food for $3.00 after coupons! WHAT?! I guess I really need to get my butt in gear with couponing. What coupon tricks do you have?

MY stance on CIO (crying it out)

Last night when I was getting little man aka baby bear ready for bed, things were going great. I was getting him relaxed for bed. You know the routine; brush his two teethies, change him into night night gear, and give him his bottle. We usually watch a children's movie, during Halloween time it was Charlie Brown Halloween. Last night we watched the original movie "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory" with Gene Wilder.It was great to watch and soon he was sleeping soundly. Normally transitioning him into his bed is not a problem. But, here lately it has been a nightmare. This is partly due to his separation anxiety and his teething. Put all of that with his getting a shot and you get fun times.

He was sleeping until he hit the mattress in his crib then it was scream city. It became a Roman collusium battle, he was the lion and I was the gladiator. I was loosing. He wanted me to stand with him, I didn't want to stand with him. I would try to get him to calm down in my arms and he would force himself into a pretzel. I would tell him, "OK,I am putting you down. You are being mean to mommy and pulling my hair and I do not want to drop my little man." I would gently place his screaming and wiggly body into his crib. This would make it worse. I tried to let him self soothe and left the room.

I went into my bedroom and heard the screaming. It was loud and horrible and I felt like a horrible mom. I felt like I was being short with him but I wasn't. I just didn't know what to do. I was lost. He was throwing a temper tantrum that would put toddlers to shame. Or so I thought. I thought maybe he wants the rest of his bottle after all, this was something he kept refusing in his room during the epic battle. I couldn't do it, I couldn't just let him cry it out. I felt wrong about it. And after an hour of this battle going on, I had to do something.
I went into the baby's nursery where he was screaming and not knowing what to do. I picked my baby up and held him close. He was trying to breath at this point and he still has issues with breathing now and then since his birth. This is something the pediatrician said will continue to get better, and it has.I took him back into our bedroom, turned Willy Wonka back on and finally he took his bottle. The tears were still running down baby bear's face. But a smile broke out and a relaxed breath after. He was happy and falling back asleep, only this time it was a sleep that lasted all night. He was able to be put in his crib, and he slept all night.
I am not sure if I am cut out for CIO, right now I do not feel it is good. For either of us, right now it isn't for me. Some women would say I am enabling the behavior, but I know plenty of  mamas that do not CIO and their children are happy and healthy. I do not think it is healthy to let a baby scream like that. At least for me and for him. It breaks my heart and it hurts him. Crying a bit before sleep is one thing but this, is another. I do not discredit those who do CIO, if you do and it works that is awesome.
I do not feel I am CIO mom, I can not do it. Or at least can not for right now.

What are your thoughts on CIO(crying it out)?How long do you let them cry or scream? Do you only do CIO for naps and not bedtime?  I can understand why so many moms do it, and I can totally understand those who don't.

Oh no,a clingy baby and you.

The other night, Halloween night to be exact was fun of fun and mayhem. It was also full of one baby who was as my sister put it needed baby xanax. He is going through the clingy faze. It was really aparent when I try to put him down for a nap and wakes up. Wakes up because he is done sleeping is one thing, waking up because mommy is not there is another. Believe me, I love him and when he needs me I feel all melty. But, when he doesn't; like when his aunt is holding him, he is a gremlin. A feisty gremlin. He is not hurting and he certainly is not in danger, but he wants his mommy. Flattering and annoying at the same time. It is also embarrassing, because he is crying at everyone. If I am not around he is OK, but, the minute I walk into view or he hears me, WATCH OUT!

He is going through a phase, I know. He will grow out of it and then not want me at all. So, I kind of take advantage of this not so interesting phase. Soon he wont want mommy. This whole needing mommy clingy phase makes it hard to put him down to play. Mainly you can not tell if he is genuinely wanting to play and just be or he wants to play but mommy better be there in reach.  He can be playing and forget I am there and thusly I get some eBay stuff done, but heavens help me if I cough or sneeze. Then it is waaaaaaahhhhhhsville. I love this little boy but, come on toys are more exciting than me. Even if our "where is baby" games are of legend, his neat noisy toys are fun! So what am I going to do about this? Let him grow out of it and let people I trust watch him. Even if it is only for an hour, at least I will get mommy time.

By the way did you know books are for eating? My son thinks so. #Lesson learned.

Crying at nap time, let the fun begin.

I'm trying to get stuff done today, baby boy needs a nap, and I can not hold him while he is sleeping. We have a morning routine, we dance together. I get my exercise and he get to be bounced around. We have fun and he is getting too comfy and ends up sleeping on me. That is a habit I am trying to break. I have tried sleep training early on and he didn't do it very well. Now here I am with a screaming baby who is so tired and needs to learn to comfort himself. Pediatrician said he could cry a little. I go and check on him, let him know it's ok. But, he throws tantrums that put 2 year olds to shame. I am talking throwing himself and going in circles. He is an epic fitter. My sweet baby bear.
I know his reasons for being really bad today. Normally after me going in his room once or twice and giving kissies and hugs, he settles down and zzzzz. He got his shots Wens. Since then I have had one clingy and not so happy little man. He got part one of the flu vaccine. Yes, I believe in vaccinating my kid. My little man is a bit under the weather and he was up and down last night. So, I expected a crabby baby today. How am I doing it? Well, lots of patience. He is my little man, my baby bear. I love this little kid with all my heart. That is how I do it. Sure there are times I wonder if there is a record for loudest fit by a 6 month old. Then I snap out of that, and go back to snuggling that little meanie monster.

I am quite curious how many mom's out there do the whole cry it out thing. I can't. I know he is sometimes testing me with his epic fits,no tears. But the rest he really does need something. So, mom's chime in and what do you think about crying it out, how long do you let them cry when it is nap time?

Sleepless in Florida

It was a dark and stormy night last night. Perfect for sleeping right? Well in most cases yes, in mine ha um....no. It wasn't because of little man, although he did wake up at 3am. I forgot his cereal before bed. Oops. Mom of the year here. I haven't been able to sleep because of worry and stress. Money and lack of it is my main issue. I worry about everything, that is not abnormal for me. And my post partum depression isn't making it better, infact kind of down blog posts I feel are a result of it. But, they say you got to talk about your problems to feel better,right?  I have my eBay store, which I am going to name after my fashion blog Gofashiondeals. It is helping me a lot, the only thing that is rough about this is my printer broke and we are a one car family. I rely on my husband to drop off at the post office. Not to mention eBay doesn't make funds available until you get everything shipped, have 25 sales, and OR $250 in sales. Almost there! And that makes me feel really good!

One day I hope we can get two cars, one day I hope we can go on vacation, one day I hope we can finally get rid of this ugly hand-me-down couch. It's over 20years old. It sucks seeing everyone else have and achieve so much and we keep getting kicked down. I try to be positive, but I am not sure how long it will last. I already feel my positive outlook on this fading.Like this is my chance of starting my own business or getting my blogs better.And slowly that can do attitude is changing.I thought there is light at the end of the tunnel, now all I can think of is how far away the light at the end is.

Being a mom means.....

I find myself loosing track of things. Like if I emptied the trash or if I ate that morning.  I have little time. Who would have thought having a baby would have so much impact on time. Between him and trying to get my ebay store up and running, I am lucky to get a hot cup of  coffee. Tia and Tamara say it all "I'm lucky if I get a bath or take a shower. I'm lucky to have on clean underwear".

Yeah. You know you have no time when you're washing your hair in the bathroom sink and haven't shaved in days! I tried to read while my baby boy watched Peppa pig. Nope. He is trying to crawl and is rolling all over the living room. He is mobile. Oh my God he is mobile. His naps are sporadic and not long. Being a mom means chasing baby and juggling the world.

I spend my afternoon lost in a game of peek a boo and get da baby.  But that is ok, I wouldn't change it for the world.  There is so much love for this little man.
Even when he "fits".

I try to keep the house clean as I am ocd about it. I see how women just stop caring about themselves and focus on everyone else. They feel there is no time even to get dressed, let alone do hair and makeup.  I find my hair is up all the time. A. Because of mr grabbyhands and B. I just am too spastic to flat iron it.
I do put makeup on or try to at least. Obe day I had only one eye done. It's ok no one saw. I do get dressed right when I wake up so at least I got that done. But, I do totally get why so women just give up and why so many get defensive.  I would be defensive too.
So what am I going to do? I am going to try to make more time. Hence the word TRY.  Wish me luck!

He was asleep, and now he isn't, is he?

Sleep is a beautiful thing. It is magical and awe inspiring, at least for parents of a baby that was sleeping and now isn't. Oh little guy why wont you sleep? I thought I had him on a schedule of some sort. I followed the guidelines my pediatrician gave me. And one day it worked the next not so much!

He would go whole night of sleep for several days in a row, then all of a sudden no sleep or very little. But, last night I may have discovered a link to him being up. A. When I got home from work I would cuddle with my boy and he would sleep. B. I would give him his bottle of the evening too early. C. He was gassy and finally D. He is starting to teeth.

Cuddling for me is a stress reliever when I get home. I miss that little giggly baby boy and all I want to do is hug,kiss, and never let go of him. Well, that is all fine and dandy, but, he would ultimately fall asleep. Big problem there, because that is a factor in my no sleep and my not sleeping kid. So, while I do hug and love on him I do not let him sleep when it is 6:30pm. It helps. Especially when he had a nap 2 hours prior. So, we play more sure,tummy time and him with his gym.

Bottle time. My goodness, who would have thought this would be a factor? But it is. I would get home and see he is making some sign of hunger and try to shove a bottle at him.I started to wonder why he would only eat 2 to 3 ounces. Still being on breast feeding 2 hour regiment I got myself used to it and the boy. But formula fed babies can actually go longer in between feedings. It takes more time for the formula to digest, and my son has gone 3 to 4 hours in between feedings on formula. So, I make sure of his last bottle and wait. Sure enough he went through the night by letting him go a few hours between eating. He didn't wake up wanting a bottle at 2 am. Of course ask your pediatrician about feeding, mine said formula fed babies can actually go 4 to 5 hours before a bottle. And of course there are exceptions, thanks growth spurts.

Gas! Oh my God, the gas!!!! My little man had trouble at night due to gas. We found out part of the issue was the formula. He was on Similac Advance which is a great formula, however, we had to switch him to the Similac for gas and fussiness. It is the orange container, and is a soy based formula. He loves that stuff and never pushes a bottle away anymore. I'll touch more on the formula woes later.

Teething. I'll be honest that part scares me. My nieces were just fabulous when teething. I recall the drool, everything is chewable, and the beautiful tube of ora gel. I know teething well, but I didn't realize it would start now. The things I learn, and teething can start at 2 months! And little guy has the beginning of teething, I know, I have the puddles of drool to prove it. As well as my little guy has his hands in his mouth a lot! Nom nom nom, hands, nom nom.

Last night we got a whole night of sleep by sticking to our schedule. It was glorious. My husband got up on time, I had energy as did he, and baby was in a great mood(yesterday he was Oscar the Grouch). We were not the zombie parents today,nope! We were well functioning parents who had coffee, coffee we could enjoy, and not for fuel consumption. This whole sleep thing, I could get used to. How are you dealing with sleep now?

Nothing beats a mama's love.

Today was my little guy's 2 month follow up. It was the usual appointment, weight the baby, measure the baby,measure the baby's noggin, and go over the necessary stuff. All was good in the land of baby, until the baby's day was ruined. Ruined by a series of needle pricks for vaccines. Something necessary and yet, it is still heart breaking to watch the baby go from oblivious giggles and cooing to gut retching squeals. I was at work when this happened, so I didn't see him squeal or bleed.

It still breaks my heart and I wish I was there. My husband does a great job, well he is an amazing dad, but there is just something about a mom's presence that makes it all better. From a simple touch to a soft spoken it's alright, moms just can make an upset child alright again. I truly believe we have 6th sense or ability for nurturing. Still, I was not there today, and it is ok I am making up for it now. But, I wish I had been there to hold him and say those magic words, "mama's here,it's ok".
Right now I have my little guy in my arms, he has been attached since we picked him up. He started to fuss so I kissed his little tennis ball head, put a blanket on, and am now holding him humming the Lord of The Rings theme. And, right now, besides baby Tylenol, it is exactly what my little guy needs.

Baby weight and body issues.

I went to Target and saw the newest designer for Target, I thought to myself do I dare try it on? Nope, I made a direct line right to the baby stuff. I figured buying my boy something was better than me in a dressing room fighting with a dress. Hurray for post-partum and the struggle with body image. When you are pregnant friends and family tell you things wont be the same and your body changes. Yes we know, what I guess what I didn't know was by how much.  Arms bigger than they were,  chest is bigger, hips, and butt. The pants you used to wear are only able to go up halfway.  The dress you used to wear, you know the one, is now like packing a sausage. You figured it would be back into you pre-pregnancy clothes after baby. Well guess again! There are some ladies who are fotunate enough to get back right away into those regular clothes. Me? I am not one of them! Nope. I lost 25pounds after little guy and have been plateaued since. My clothes hang in the closet mocking me. I am still in my maternity items and while they are cute, I want to be able to wear all my clothes. I can fit into some tops but not all. And I am almost considering buying some new clothes for my new curvier self. What to do? How many mamas have just said the hell to it and gone and purchased some new things. Either as an self esteem boost or just as a inbetween size to get you through. I am curious to see what others are doing, going to do, or did.

Also, with work, baby, hubby, and housework, how do you get your exercise groove back.?

Why are there limited CUTE boy clothes?

I was out shopping with my mom one day picking up diapers and formula when I decided to look for some clothes for little guy. I saw plenty of little girl clothes that were cute as can be but the boys clothing was sub par. I mean the clothes were cute but not as cute as the girly things.
Then my sister and my brother in-law went to the Children's Place to look for little guy clothes. They found more ugly and drab clothing for boys and an immense amount of cute skirts,dresses,shirts, pants,etc for girls. Good to know that someone else felt the same way, as I thought it was just me. But the truth is there is not much for boys and that is disappointing. I go to Toys R Us and look online for something and sure there are cute baby blue onsies and "mama rocks!" Onsies. Which he already has, probably should get more because I do rock!
But why are the clothing they make for little boys not as fun? Why can't boys have as many options must it always just be about button downs, zippers, and body suits? And has anyone noticed that  for some onsies and body suits it is hard to tell what gender it is for?  Can't 0-3 months have more options? Sure, if they are a girl.

This was hard for me when I was pregnant and clothes shopping at Toys r Us and Target for my future little blue arrival. Nothing made me wow! I did see once at Ross baby boy clothing by Ralph Lauren and it was cute, also affordable. But alas I didn't pick the items up. I put the clothes back.  And I am kicking myself for that.

So designers and department stores beef up that baby boy section! Get more options for mommies to dress our boys in!
Now there is some light at the end of the tunnel, my sister did find 2 cute onsies and a pair of shorts. I guess you really really have to look.

Any ideas?

Wahm, a dream

It's 6:30am I just finished a cup of coffee while, feeding the pets, making lunches, getting a bottle ready, and fixing the diaper bag. All this to hurry up and get the little guy ready for his day at grandma's house and my day at work. All this rushing so I can spend a collective 40 mins with him before work. I should tell you it breaks my heart and I feel bad that it isn't me with him all day. I am told it gets easier and yeah while it is getting a bit easier there is that pit in my stomach and feeling of guilt.
So what to do? I am trying to find a way to be a work at home mom or WAHM. I want to be able to keep an eye little guy while still bringing in an income. While I try to find something it is also hard to tell what's a scam and what's not. I found a great site www.wahm.com that has some opportunitiesand maybe there will be something there.  I will keep looking for something.  I can have it all right?

A battle royale, the fight for sleep.

I have the most epic nights, sleepless, filled with chatter in the baby monitor. Partly my fault, the other his.This battle for a sleep schedule is driving me slowly to the brink of sleep deprived insanity.  My son slept for a few days all night, several days in a row! It was great! I got much needed sleep and so did my hubby. All was good in the house, but I was still home. I could still make his schedule and even if he was up all night it was ok. I could be with him and attempt to slept during his nap. But, I am back at work, trying to get him to bed at the times I had was not and is not easy. I can no longer just tough it out, I need some sleep. And I should be trying to keep him up but all I want is too hold him. No matter what time of day, thanks baby withdrawal.

Now, he did sleep one night all night, but I was still up. I would zombie my way into his room at the smallest peep. I would see he is asleep and go back to bed, but alas I would be back up and out of bed. That is my fault.

And here I sit baby in lap, trying to keep him up so I can get him on a schedule. Is it working? NO. He is sleeping and not wanting to be up. Truly a great fight and I am loosing it.

I typed that up last night, after a bath(which he peed in) and bottle i got him down. But it was a small victory he didn't sleep long. I'm sure it will even out but right now it is tough.